Top Ten Ridiculously Obscure Things You Don’t Know About Alexander the Great

By Siri McGuire

 

Finally, an excuse to put my random passion to use.

1.       He is 2,368 years young.

2.       He was way cooler than Julius Caesar. (Even Caesar thought so.)

3.       It is possible he was the great-great-great-great… etc. uncle of Cleopatra. Ptolemy I Soter, who founded the Ptolemaic dynasty in Egypt, was an alleged half-brother of Alexander the Great. Guess what leader ended Ptolemaic rule in Egypt? Cleopatra.

4.       All traces of his tomb disappeared after the 4^th century AD. The location of his tomb is considered to be one of the greatest archeological mysteries of all time.  (And it’s my mission in life to find it.)

5.       He named a city in Asia after his beloved steed, Bucephalus . ( Oh yeah, and twenty cities after himself.)

6.       The Roman Emperor Augustus, when visiting the tomb of Alexander the Great, accidentally knocked off the conqueror’s nose. Common mistake, right?

7.       He literally altered the face of the Earth. To conquer the island of Tyre, Alexander’s army built a causeway to connect the island to the mainland. Tyre has never been an island since- it’s still a full-fledged peninsula.

8.       When asked on his deathbed to whom he would leave his kingdom, he allegedly replied,  “to the strongest,”- his last words. Though awfully poetic, these last words weren’t really helpful to his top generals, who would spend the next forty years fighting over what Alexander left behind.

9.       His mother, Olympias, was pretty crazy. She’s accused of having a hand in the murder of Alexander’s father, Philip the II, poisoning Alexander’s half-brother (also named Philip), and playing with snakes frequently.

10.   He never lost a battle, and his military strategies are still studied in military academies across the United States.

So why should you care? Good question. I’m still figuring that one out myself. Maybe I’m just weird. But anyway, if you think about it, if you die and 2,000+ years later people like me are writing blog posts about you, that’s pretty impressive.

10 Little Known Facts About Color Guard

By Amanda Lawrence

I pledge allegiance to the flags and the color guard team of Concordia.

If you take a look at the band, chances are you won’t be watching the band. You will probably be watching the color guard, more commonly known as the” flag girls” even though the former is preferred. Here are a few little known facts, ten to be precise, about your Concordia color guard.

1)      We not only have to march but also learn and remember routines, ALL WHILE SMILING. Take it from me; it is hard to smile after you have hit yourself in the head with a pole once or twice. 

2)      As mentioned before, color guard is a dangerous sport, but participation does not require that a parent sign a physical or concussion form. BUT IT SHOULD. I’m sure more head injuries occur in color guard than in cross country and tennis combined.

3)      We have 6:30 a.m. practices multiple times a week and some night practices are required to create, teach, learn and memorize new routines. (Don’t mess with a girl who has a flag in her hand and has lost an hour of sleep because of it.)

4)      One major perk is the assurance of no CDs skipping or technical difficulties with our music.  Unlike the dance team, we have a band!

5)      We always joke about our Point System: a series of winnable points depending on who you hit.  Some favorites are 20 points for a kid at Fall Fest, 50 for an opposing cheerleader who doesn’t move out of the way, and an infinite number of points for a percussionist. (Despite our jokes, we have all hit someone and our consciences refuse to let us forget it which leads to no official tallying of points.)

6)      There are a lot of wannabes, but not everyone can be in color guard because someone has to play the music. I guess the saying’s true, “There are two types of people in the world, those who spin and those who wish they could.”

7)      We are constantly making up new moves, most of which never make it into a routine. (We have discovered that it’s hard to do a cartwheel while picking up a flag and marching at the same time.)

8)      Although our team is made up entirely of girls, more guys than girls were signed up for auditions this year.

9)      There is an ongoing feud between the color guard and the drum line which has lasted for years. This rivalry is mainly fueled by the drum line erroneously claiming their superiority.

10)   As stressful as color guard can be, one of the best moments is at the end of a performance when you know that the eyes of the crowd are on you and you did well. (Plus we look pretty good in those uniforms.)

The Pros and Cons of Working at a Fast Food Restaurant

By Micah Fabarez

Pros:

1.       You have the advantage of being able to work all year instead of just the summer.

 

2.       You can get a flexible schedule that works around sports and school.

 

3.       You get discounted food since you work there.

 

4.       If you work at Sonic you get minimum wage and tips so you get a little more money than other fast food places.

 

5.       You occasionally get really impressive awesome stories to tell your friends.  For example I was working late one night and the Storm Chaser crew rolled up to the drive through in their tank-like vehicles!

 

 

Cons:

 

1.       You have to deal with mean people who are very impatient.

 

2.       You are on your feet for 5-6 hours so your back hurts at the end of nearly every shift.

 

3.       The working environment is not the cleanest so you end up with a shirt, shorts, and shoes that smell like the fast food restaurant no matter how many times you wash them.

 

4.       You have to hear people’s complaints about the food and stay calm and very polite the entire time.

 

5.       You have to close during the school year sometimes which means get home at midnight or later.

Top Ten Things You Should Know about Being a Football Manager

By Chelsea Martin



Football managing is not all it is cracked up to be. While we have the chance to watch good- looking guys sweat and work out, it also has its drawbacks. There are definitely more cons than there are pros.

1.     When they ask to use a towel, expect it to be soaked with sweat when you get it back.

2.     Get used to the LOUD passing of gas from a number of players.

3.     Do not stand too close to the sideline or the coaches during practice and pay attention. Otherwise, you will get trampled.

4.     When you hear them yell, “WATER!” you better have full bottles ready.

5.     Have a life-time supply of tape in the medicine kit. You would be surprised how many body parts they tape.

6.     The conversations they have sometimes surprise you.  Football is rarely a common topic, but Icy-Hot is!

7.     Do not wear nice clothes to practice. You get soaked on a daily basis.

8.     Blood, saliva, vomit, and many other repulsive fluids are common.

9.     If you don’t like loud, insane, irate sports, do not become a football manager.

10.      If you get easily grossed out, football managing isn’t the job for you.

The Good and Bad of Being a Teacher's Kid

By Janae Champlin

Good: You know everything and anything about everyone.

Bad: You can’t tell.

Good: You can borrow money from your mom.

Bad: You have to pay her back.

Good: Teachers treat you like their own kid.

Bad: They talk to your mom every day.

Good: Your mom is there to sign anything on the day its due.

Bad: She won’t be happy with you once you get home.

Good: All the upperclassmen know your name.

Bad: Sometimes it's “Mrs. Champlin’s Daughter”.

Good: You know your way around the school.

Bad: You’re not allowed in “some” places.

Good: You get into any game free.

Bad: Nothing bad about that.

Bad: If you have a bad grade she’s the first to find out.

Also Bad: If you have a good grade everyone says it’s because you are a teacher’s kid.

The Bests and Worsts of Being a Lifeguard

By Kirstyn Dvorak

Bests:

1. One perk of being a lifeguard is getting to swim for free. When it’s 100 degrees outside and I have been lifeguarding all day it’s nice to get to go swimming without having to spend my hard earned money.

2. Another good thing about being a lifeguard is not having to follow the rules I am getting paid to enforce. We can run around the outside of the pool, hang off the end of the diving boards, float on the basketball, and perform gainers, homers, and running backflips no questions asked.

3. One of the better parts about being a lifeguard is the hours. Other than the dreaded Tuesday morning meetings, I almost never have to be to work before one 1:00, which gives me time to sleep in and be to work with time to spare.

4. Another perk is making money. Being a lifeguard requires me to do almost nothing and get paid. I sit on my butt all day. Let’s face it, hardly anyone ever starts drowning, so all I do is watch kids play games and have fun.

5. My favorite part about being a lifeguard is getting to spend time with my fellow lifeguards. When I see someone every day it’s hard not to become friends, and I end up with a few more great people in my life.

Worsts:

1. The number one worst part of being a lifeguard is having small, defiant children disobey me. There is nothing that angers me more than when I make a simple request such as, “Please don’t float on the basketball,” and some snotty little 8 year old gives me the stink eye, especially since I can’t do anything about it. As a lifeguard, I’m there to save lives, not try to whip kids into shape, so all I can do is take the stink eye with a smile and wait for them to break another rule so I can sit them out.

2. The second worst part is the heat. When I have to sit in the sun for two hours in-between breaks and my job is watching other people take a refreshing dip in nice cold water, I can get a little upset.

3. Another bad part about being a lifeguard is having “auxiliary”, which means I have to clean the pool, bathrooms, and take out the trash. I am one of those people with a weak stomach, and when I have to swim twelve feet down to the bottom of the pool to retrieve a giant ball of someone else’s hair, it makes me want to quit my job.

4. One of the worst parts is having to sit on the stand while my friends are swimming. Being a lifeguard is a fairly boring job, and when I see my friends having fun and have to sit there making sure they don’t drown, it’s even worse.

5. Another bad part about being a lifeguard is having Tuesday morning meetings. During the summer it’s easy to get my days mixed up and when I have to call one of the lifeguards every Tuesday at 8 a.m. because he or she thinks it is Monday, it gets annoying. Especially when I’m the lifeguard they always have to call.

10 Things You Don't (and Should) Know About Brazil

10 things you don’t (and should) know about Brazil

By Fernanda Santos

1. We speak PORTUGUESE, not Spanish!!!

2. We don’t ride monkeys, elephants, tigers and anything like that.

3. Yes, we know American shows. We do have television and internet and cellphones in Brazil.

4^th- We spell it Brasil with an “S” NOT with “z”.

5^th- Our traditional dish is rice, beans, French fries and meat (we eat a bunch of meat).

6^th- “Chow” is how you say “bye” in Portuguese and it is written tchau.

7^th- We hug a lot for no reason, so if I am hugging you that does not mean I am in love with you.

8^th- We love soccer, the carnival and the beach, but that isn’t everything we think about.

9^th-Everytime we run into someone we give two kisses on the cheek, and we ALWAYS say goodbye when we are leaving a place.

10^th-We love the American culture, and we love tourists so come visit us!

Top 10 Solutions to Our Laptop Problem

Top Ten Solutions to Our Laptop Problem:
By Cody Schmitz

As we all know (some of us are even counting down the days), Concordia High's laptop lease expires in a little under a year. Wave goodbye to constant computer crashes and shouts of, "Can I go to the Tech Lab?" - the laptop's reign is nigh!  Rumors and speculation have been flying, but has anyone actually stopped to think, "What's best for our children?"

Well, I'm here to tell you what's best.

In fact, here are 10 things that would be better replacements to our school laptops than anything some committee could conjure up.

1. iPads


The obvious answer. We like 'em cause they're fun! Many complain that you can't write a research paper on an iPad. Here's my answer to that: You can't! That's the best part! With iPads, the school would have to completely ban papers because they're impossible! In fact, why don't we just ban school work? It's too hard to do on an iPad. Angry Birds for all!

2. Personal Assistants

Okay, hear me out on this one. At enrollment, every student receives a "personal person" to follow them around all day. This assistant will do almost anything for you - take notes, get you snacks, Google stuff for you, even raise your hand for you! It's perfect! The human Siri! I guess we probably can't take them home... Maybe you just check them in and out in the library? I don't know, this plan has holes that still need patching.

3. Tablets

No, not iPads. We talked about those just 2 list items ago, forgetful reader. I'm talking old school.

Let's just chisel our notes into stone! We'll never lose them, but you wouldn't be able to correct teachers anymore because their words are literally set in stone. It's perfect*! (Hey, it worked for Moses and Fred Flintstone.)

*I think perfect has lost is meaning in this article.

10. Pencil and Paper

Think about it, it's just like typing, but completely customizable! Endless possibilities: Draw a picture, take some notes, write a story - paper is the future!



...



Okay, to tell you the truth, it's hard to come up with 10 items to replace our laptops. (I may have skipped a number or two in there) But close enough! No wonder our administration still doesn't know what we're doing for sure after these laptops.

I'm sure whatever they come up with will work well for our school, but if I were to throw my hat into the ring... I'd push for the Assistant Approach. (Patent Pending)